If wishes were horses…

‘t was the year 1203 AD. Ye Olde Britain was under the rule of King John. Robin Hood had no clue he would be the hero of countless ballads and multiple motion pictures. If only he knew how he could woo women, like in those movies…

It was a time when the typical conversation had been one where the men discussed the day’s weather and the more loquacious free thinking types debated the English climate and if it was getting any hotter in Spofforth. Spofforth was a peaceful town. Not the kind of idyllic towns that the movies about idyllic towns are set in, no!. No self-respecting story would ever be set in Spofforth. Oh! wait.

When Amit Kumar, the time- traveling salesman, landed in Spofforth he is said to have exclaimed “Abeyaar, this is like that Shire only naa. From that Lord of the Rings movie”. But nobody understood him because it was Ye Olde Britain, you see. Amit had not intended to leave the twentieth century for the 12th but there’s only so many Amits that a mid-size Universe can accommodate before the space-time continuum gives way.

A month before Amit Kumar had traveled to Spofforth, it was when he had finished watching the LotR movies, in 12th century Spofforth any happenstance historians would have recorded the following conversation.

Farmer 1 (F1): Say, hasn’t the weather been wandering all over the place; rain, sun and snow in the same week.

F2: Yeah, it’s gotten boaring, if you know what I mean?

F1 (sigh, at the joke): If wishes were horses…

Anaphylaxis, a passing angel with a propensity to rashly grant wishes, heard this and smiled.

So it was that when Amit Kumar landed in Spofforth, the townsfolk were always wondering as to why there had been so many horses in the countryside, of late.

Amit saw a bunch of Black horses galloping across a field and thought to himself: “Abeyyy, sahi hai. Yeh to same to same LOTR hi hai. Wish I had brought Mala with me”.

Just then a horse materialized out of nowhere and started stomping towards Amit, who thought was already thinking about what his Tam-bram manager, whom he had nicknamed Saar-uman,  might say when he found that Amit had reached the office late. “ What saaar, coming to office oll-ways late?”. He wished his leave for a week had been approved. “Saaar, if wishes were aaarses…”, Saaruman had said. Amit wondered what he had meant.

In all this while, Amit observed, about half a dozen horses had materialized out of nowhere. “Oh shiiiiiit!”, he realised what Saaruman had meant and frantically wished that wishes were not horses.

A prancing pony appeared where his head had been a few moments ago, had he not dived sideways. “Abbaeyyyaaaar”, he said.

Credits:

The Idea: http://chroniclesofdementia.blogspot.com/2010/09/when-beatles-met-amits.html